"Being a family means you are part of something wonderful. It means you will love and be loved for the rest of your life. No matter what." ~Author Unknown



Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Two visits today!

We were so happy when we found out this morning we would have two visits!  We got to the orphanage around 10:00 and were able to spend over an hour with her.  She was the same as last night!  She came in and was apprehensive.  She cried a bit at first, but I just hold her and she settles down.  After awhile she will let me sit down and we get some activity out.  Today she liked the photo album of our family that I brought to leave at the orphanage.  We flipped through that a few times, and Mark just slowly starts to inch closer.  She is fine with him an arms length away as long as she is securely on my lap!  Eventually he got some mega blocks out and she showed an interest in those.  He gives her one, she gives it back, on and on.  Then I slowly have her stand in between my legs while still holding her around the waist.  Finally she can't stand it anymore and she starts freely playing with the blocks!  She's very funny...particular I guess.  She will only put the single blocks with the single blocks, and the double with the double and so on.  If she is building a tower and you give her the wrong block she gives it back and says NEYT!  Then she seperated all the blocks on different chairs according to their size.  There was one that was different, kinda like a roof piece of sorts, it was making her so mad!  She kept putting it on the different chairs and she just couldn't decide where she wanted it!  She was so full of it and really enjoying herself.  Then all the sudden she decides she needs a cuddle and she will come running to me to hold her.  She LOVES me to hold her and sit with her.  It's hard because we so enjoy watching her play, and want to see her interact with things and hear her laugh, but she would really be happy just getting loved up for the hour.  That doesn't promote a relationship with Mark though!  So we try to encourage her to play, but when she's done and comes back to me we give her the cuddle time she so desperately wants and needs.  Mark has been very patient!  I know he would love to get his hands on her, but he's letting it happen on her terms.  It was a really great visit and not hard to say good bye because we knew we'd be back in a few hours.  While she was eating and napping we went to the notary to fill out paperwork.  After that we stayed in the area of the orphanage for lunch because if we went back by the hotel the traffic would have caused us to miss our last visit.  I didn't want that visit to come, because then it would be gone!  We got back to the orphanage and they brought her to us and same drill!  She was not as playful tonight, wanted me to hold her more.  I said, "Maybe she knows this is it and she's sad too".  Mark said, "No, she's just pissed we took her away from TV time".  I think my version is sweeter.  Typical...She was fussy, and wanted me to stand and  hold her.  She did play for a little while, and let Mark feed her some applesauce off a spoon.  That was interesting to see.  She ate it but showed little feeling about it.  Eating isn't an option there.  It's put in front of them and they eat.  That's it.  It's not good nor bad.  I don't think she even knows that it's an option to like it and want more, or to not like it and not eat it.  I was also more aware tonight of the fact that she does not know that if she puts her arms up that means she wants to be held.  It's like the universal baby language, but it means nothing when you live with 80 other babies.  It was sad to see these behaviors in her.  She lives at a very priviliged orphanage, but there are just some things they cannot provide those kids.  Anyway, we were so happy to have the extra time with her tonight.  I have no words for the good bye.  You can imagine.  We know she is being well taken care of and we will return quickly.  Tomorrow we will leave for the airport at 5:45, fly 3 hours to Amsterdam and 8 hours back to Detroit.  With the time change it gets us home in the afternoon which is great.  Can't wait to see our other girls and enjoy the holidays!          

5 comments:

  1. Thanks for going easy on us with the goodbye :)She'll be home where she belongs for good so soon! Safe and smooth travels...

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  2. So happy to hear that your last two visits were great!! She sounds like quite the character!

    My husband and I found it sad too with some of the behaviors in our little guy. He bumped his head the one night and didn't even cry.....granted I didn't want to see him cry but it was sad to know that he probably doesn't bother because nobody will comfort him (not because they don't want to but who can with all of the other kids and only two hands?!).

    The goodbye.....it's the worst! Hang in there and know that you will only have to do that one more time before she becomes yours FOREVER!! (This is what we keep telling ourselves as we wait.)

    Hoping for safe travels for you and a speedy court date!!

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  3. Happy to hear you are getting closer to completing your family :)
    Wishing you safe travels for your trip home.

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  4. So glad all went well, she sounds amazing!! Can't wait to meet her :) We hope you have a safe and uneventful trip home!! Merry Christmas!!

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  5. Jen, it is so great that you got 2 visits in 1 day. I wonder if you ate at a place that serves stuffed Potatoes? It is like put whatever you want in with the potatoes and it is all Carbs? We ate their once, and it is very close to the orphanage. Praying for safe returns and a speedy court date. What about 8 weeks? Our Ava is very "type A" personality also. Maybe it has something to do with their routine there.

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