April, It Goes On

At Brian’s birthday party, we were talking to Ami about the possibility of Adrienne wearing a Sari to prom. Ami and her friends jumped right in to help her!  We went to Ami’s the next night and tried on all sorts of options.  So fun!

The Easter Bunny made a visit to our house!

Can we talk about the fact that I didn’t make Sof wear cute pajamas to bed?  She’s like a teenager.

The girls found their eggs, although we’re missing a green one so someday someone’s gonna find it and get a $1 or some stale candy!

 

The stash was pretty good.

We headed off to Kzoo for the afternoon to have dinner with Grandma Linda, Grandma Jackie, and Papa Curt.

When we have time with Grandma Jackie we have to use it wisely, so we rolled a bunch of birthdays into the celebration!

 

Happy Birthday to ALL our spring peeps!

Em and I try really hard to get together for dessert ON the kid’s bdays.  Sometimes it’s a Sunday night, sometimes after activities too late on a school night, and sometimes it’s after a long day of visitation.  But we make it happen.

It’s hard to explain the difference before and after Ethan.  You won’t see it here.  It looks very much the same, but trust me when I say, it changed everything.

We went back to the gym and school.

Tropical Smoothie is all the rage right now, so lunch with the cousins often happens there!

We had a beautiful night for Sof’s book club.  Not sure why I sugar them up first??

My student teacher graduated.  So proud of this young lady.  She’s got a bright future ahead of her in teaching!

Sof started a bird unit at school, and she was completely hooked.  We got this new notebook for her write down facts and drawings about her assigned bird, the hummingbird.

We might be turning a corner with tiny shit.  You know, all the little toys that have a million accessories and last 3.2 seconds before lost and/or scattered everywhere?  Sof had a Target gift card she’d been dying to spend.  Because obviously we need more Littlest Pet Shops.  I relented and took her shopping.  Lo and behold she picked out a new bedding set.  Whaaaaat?  I’m not sure it would have been my very first choice, but it certainly isn’t offensive, and I didn’t have to buy it!  WIN!

(excuse the rest of the messy room, just look at the bed)

Zach was having a birthday and Kaitlyn just had a birthday, so we figured it was a great reason to get together.  Graeme does not care what the reason, he’s just in for the party!

Audrey mentioned she didn’t want to go to her prom now that Ethan wouldn’t be there.  The kids were all trying to talk her into it, but she wasn’t comfortable.  So, they devised a plan for Adrienne to take her.  Adrienne called her school to okay it, and was all ready to ask her!  Unfortunately, Audrey had to work and couldn’t come that night, so we took a picture and sent it to her.  She said yes!

No surprise we had to improvise with the candles!  11 for Kaitlyn and 15 for Zach!

Zach only wanted stocks for his birthday, LOL.  Mark is explaining his options.

When we’re old and you’re a gazillionaire Zach, don’t forget us!

Cullen officially asked Adrienne to prom.  He knew she was going to wear a Sari and loved the idea.  I love these confident kids.

April 2017 was the saddest, but time marches on and so do we.

When Everything Changes

Friday, April 14 was Brian’s birthday.  On the Monday before, Ami sent a group text asking who was available that night if she organized a last minute surprise party.  All of us were free.  She put it together and without knowing it then, gave us the greatest gift.  It was a night all together, with all the kids present.  They arrived with Brian, helping to orchestrate the surprise.  Nolan communicating arrival.  They came around the corner and we yelled out “Surprise”!  We exchanged hugs, the kids answering our pleasantries until they could escape to their end of the table.  They all sat together talking about everything and nothing.  What a great night.  We thanked Ami in the morning, because when it works out so perfect you wonder “Why don’t we make this happen more” and vow to do better in the future.

 

  

On Monday, April 17, Ethan took his own life.  He was so loved.  He left such a hole.  He left questions upon questions.  Most of all, he left a slew of siblings, cousins, and friends who now have to feel grief in a way young people should not experience.  The grown ups have no answers for them, no magic coping skills, no more understanding. 

These two shared milestones from birth.  They should be going off to college together now.

There’s a line in one of the songs from Hamilton that says, “Look at where we are, look at where we started”.  It’s hard to understand how you get from one place to the other, but now we’re here, and all we can do is keep moving forward and trying harder with these loves. We will always feel your absence Ethan. There will never be a time where this feels normal.